Happy Freaking New Year

New Year's Eve - my least favorite holiday of the year.  It's nothing personal, I just don't love the build up of nothing at all, and then having to find my way home into the night with people out trying to kill me.  I'm trying to find a way to be excited about it this year, but mustering something out of nothing is not easy.  Due to my cloudy memory and college binge drinking, I can only remember 2 NYEs clearly: 1. there was a girl fight in a frat house, and one girl almost ripped the head off another girl.  Obviously the fight was over a boy, and I've never been so terrified before.  2. My friend threw up all over herself on the train ruining what was a very cute winter jacket, but there was an epic amount of alcohol involved.  Beyond college, I've had many a NYE but I can only remember 3: 1. we were supposed to drive to Canada but due to a really nasty storm, we couldn't, and stayed home.  2. one year we sat on the couch the entire night, my husband had a stomach bug and I drank an entire bottle of champagne out of boredom and puked.  3. last year, we got a 6 foot sub, and had a house party - obviously the sub was the guest of honor.

This year, who knows what might happen.  I will try to remember it for you all though because nothing delivers better blog material than a night out drinking with shameless behavior at a less than exciting party.

2010 was great...

• We went on a cruise to Grand Cayman and Key West
• I survived marathon training during the hottest summer in recent memory and then ran my first marathon in Chicago - my new favorite city.
• I was a bridesmaid for the first time in the most beautiful wedding
• I visited my BFF in Philadelphia and ate a steak and cheese
• We had our 1 year wedding anniversary
• We spent the 4th of July in Newport, RI very last minute
• I joined a running group/team whatever and it improved my running a ton
• I quit eating sushi because I suddenly fear parasites 
• I didn't kill anyone on a vacation to the Cape with my parents
• We saw Wicked and failed to see what all the hype was about

I'm ready for a better 2011.  I don't like to make new year's resolutions or goals, but I'm really looking forward to going on a couple vacations and maybe buying a house.  This is going to be a big year for us in the whole Becoming Adults department (snore), so obviously our first vacation of the year in January is going to be to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter - for real. 

[cheers, don't forget your 6 foot Italian sub to eat with the champagne!]

My Island... The Couch

Does this look like the face of someone who had an enjoyable day off?  Or does it look like someone who almost threw up all over the place while trying to do a second workout at her over priced gym?

This was just not my day from the beginning.  I was minding my own business on the couch this morning when all of a sudden the tv just went black.  What does that mean?  Did the cable go out or did the tv just die? - the horror.   I turned it on and off, but it said no signal.  I called Comcast and inquired whether there were any cable outages in my area, they politely let me know that I'm not a customer with them...woops.  I called RCN and again inquired about cable outages, the Rep politely asked me if maybe the cable box had gotten shut off by accident.  Ok, he won, the mother effing cable box had somehow shut itself off!  The only thing I did know was that I didn't press anything, the remotes weren't anywhere near me, and there was no way that I wanted to have to call customer service over that.

My entire day was revolving around the two classes I wanted to take at the gym: core and bosu challenge (weights, cardio, limitless pain).  I fought for 10 minutes to find a parking spot, and then I was changing in the locker room when it hit me - no sneakers, only big furry snow boots.  I did my core class in bare feet but there was really no way I could go past that, so I came back home and signed up to take the same bosu class at night during my usual time.  How was it? Oh it sucked.  It sucked a lot, but it got me off the couch for a while and my ass is seriously starting to imprint itself here.  I don't know what my problem is, but doing a whole lot of nothing is my anthem these days.

I'd like to invent heated driveways

I was snowed in for two days and my sanity is barely intact.  The highlight of these two days was watching The Town, so now the entire northeast has finally seen it.  Blake Lively, you are really good at being a drug-addicted-and dealing Ho... nice hoops.  I swear that nobody here looks like that because our trash looks like authentic trash, not like a model with messed up hair and a bad outfit.  There are in fact too many teeth in your mouth... 

There was only one authentic Boston accent in that movie from Ben Affleck, and everyone else... it's Ok to just Not have an accent, you don't have to force it people.  Perhaps the worst Boston accent ever belongs to this girl though - Vera Farmiga in The Departed.  That performance pained me to no end, she's the reason that I can't watch the movie ever again.

Or Julianne Moore on 30 Rock.  Why would anyone choose her??  Funny yes, anything close to being authentically Boston?  No.

Anyways, Boston accent rant is now over and now Boston storm rant continues.

My town is nice and clean, but when I dropped off my husband at the T this morning it was funny to see that just a mile down the street, the city area is a total disaster.  I remember back when I'd have to shovel my silver Jetta (the silver bullet) out of snow storms on the side of the street 5-10 times a winter.  Those days sucked much like the apartment that I was living in back in 2006.  This is a whole different rant for another day.

Enjoy the melting snow, I need to get my ass to the gym even though I'm still really sore from my short run to the gym on Saturday (confirmation that I'm ridiculously out of shape).

Prime Rib, Pu Pu Platters, and Shovels

This was my Christmas late lunch with my family... that piece of meat is as large as it seems.  Prime rib cooked medium rare with au jus and plenty of veg.  My dad was so proud of this hunk of beef, maybe it's the little things these days that make him happy.

After our late lunch (which we stuffed ourselves stupid at), we had a late dinner at a local Chinese food joint with our friend...who happens to be Jewish and thinks that Chinese food on Christmas is like a way of life.  It was my first experience doing this, but I guess this stereotype is very much true considering how insanely busy it was, but it's also genius.  The food was amazing, and honestly it was a really fun way to end Christmas with a good friend.  We even brought him a musical gift:

Today, there is a storm fast approaching.  I was thinking that I'd work out in the morning and then hunker down in the afternoon, but my gym shares a parking lot with like the only grocery store nearby with parking so it's kind of a madhouse when there are any weather issues and sometimes you can't even find a parking spot.  That sort of thing ruins my mood.  Solution: Run to the gym and work out...that works right?  I bundled up, put on a fuzzy ear band thingy, and set off to the gym about 2.5 miles away.  No big thing right?  Barely a warm up even?  Or, it's a huffing and puffing nightmare come to life with snow blasting me in the face, my hands going numb (no gloves), and realizing that this is the first time in my life that I've ever run outside in the winter!  Yes, my first time ever running outside when there is snow on the ground.  It wouldn't have been that bad if I wasn't so far out of running shape, shit that was so hard.  I barely made it there, but it did feel nice to run without a tv screen in front of me and to have fresh air to breath.

It's going to be a long afternoon of watching football on the couch, so at least I was able to get in some time being active as well as being one of those crazy people who stocks up on "essentials" (diet coke, frozen pizza, frozen burritos, baby cucumbers, and arugula? wtf) when the city decides to go into a snow emergency situation.  I don't know what's wrong with me, none of what we bought today made any sense - especially the ingredients for a homemade stromboli.  I'm pretty sure we could survive snowed in for a good week with all the stuff we have in our pantry right now.

Let it snow, we're ready.

Still doesn't feel like Christmas

Merry Christmas.
We're having a late Christmas lunch of prime rib this year, which means... we can have Chinese food for dinner!!  There is nothing more exciting the satisfaction of good Chinese food piling on top of my plate.  Christmas is about family, food, and piles of gifts... ok, maybe it's really only about food.  This is like an Intervention waiting to happen.  We are addicted to good food, So What, we don't want help we just want more good food.

Welcome to the kiddie table where people serve you and cut up your lasagna.  I mean why have kids when you can just hang out with the cool ones and have people bring you beers?  - I kid, I kid.  It's still the best table to sit at with these two on Christmas Eve.

In a few hours, my dad is going to bring out a prime rib beaming with pride over a piece of meat.  We'll be there to help him appreciate it and all it's glory.  Go Meat!

Happy Christmas Eve

This is our tree last year... or lack thereof.  Two stockings and a nice big window sill:

Compared to our very special frasier fir tree this year:

This has taught us that perhaps a window sill doesn't make for a good place for putting gifts - under a tree is much better.  Under a tree that has barely shed 1 needle is even better than that even if it cost like a million dollars... ok not a million but this wasn't a $10 tree either so enjoy the view.

Happy Christmas Eve to those celebrating Christmas today, enjoy the time with your families.  I have to admit that I could kill for a freaking egg roll and some vegetable lo mein today, but dinner is probably stuffed with too much cheese shells and lots of things that I'll skip over.  Maybe I should get takeout before our holiday dinner so that I'll have something delicious to come home to (is that rude?).

Cheers.  Santa is coming...

Delivery for idiots

Do other people come home to gifts stacked this high on their front porch?  Do other people do their Christmas shopping this late into the season?  No, this is not normal.  One of these packages was ordered by me... the rest are probably gifts from my husband or something.  I think he's just relieved that they arrived on time, and I'm sort of mortified that our neighbors got to stare at that all afternoon and evening.  I'm sure they think that we are just over the top ridiculous, but how does one shop when both people work and get home late?  - over the Internet of course. 

For dinner, we were out with our friend Natasha stuffing our faces full of food like the gluttons we are at the new Island Creek Oyster Bar.  If you live in the Boston area, you should really go.  The food is great, the space is perfect, and the service is even better.  I even ate TWO oysters, which is like way more than I've ever eaten before.  It was one of those nights where I got into the car and undid my pants before driving home, yes, I unbuttoned my pants to let my gut out.  It felt So Good, I highly recommend that.  Anyways, if you haven't already tried it - go out and stuff your face and then unbutton your pants to feel how awesome that simple sweet relief can be.

Storm Tips

Oh, so it took you an hour to drive 5 miles?  It must be the first snow fall in New England.  God, people, just DRIVE!!  Strap on a pair, and just put your foot on the gas.  Honestly, there is something wrong with my fellow Bostonians, the second there is a spat of precipitation you can count on shit hitting the fan.  I mean there's 1 inch of snow on the ground.  I'm no better than the idiots out there right now, I mean I don't even have a shovel, I barely even have road rage which is good that I don't have a shovel...what?  WHAT!?  I don't know, commuting is a real bummer man especially at dinner time when you're starving and feeling like control is slipping away.  Storm Tip #1: Bring snacks.  Storm Tip #2: Bring Shovels.

I am not a psychopath.

Little Surprises

I grew up in a house that never ate frozen food except for things like chicken breast or Dove bars (weird I know, my mother has a sweet tooth).  Frozen pizza is something that I always thought really poor people or people without any taste buds ate... and yet, I've been buying a Lot of it lately and it's Good!  I'm starting to think that maybe this might be the most under-rated food ever... you know for everyone who's been living under a rock for the past 20 or so years and didn't know that frozen foods were in fact edible.  Also things that are really unexpectedly awesome: going to the liquor store at 11am on a Thursday (there's Almost nobody there), going to the post office at 9:45am during the holiday season (it will shock you how it's still busy), not having a holiday party at work (Loves), eating an entire basket of treats all by myself, and wearing earmuffs.

Battle of the chins

Who's chin is pointier?

Reese Witherspoon, the Queen of eccentric chins -

Or me...this morning -

I look like I could either stab an intruder with my chin if necessary or come out a champion in a heart-shaped face contest.  Weird things are happening around here, including unfortunate face shapes... it's the only thing that I could illustrate with a photo.  Two seconds after this, I bundled up and headed to work with my best "Angry I live here" Boston face.  Nobody messed with me.

Where has all the time gone?

Check out this basket.  That homemade sugar cookie with royal icing on the left with a reindeer face - that baby was the first one to go into my belly.  I've eaten 75% of this basket already: cookies, peppermint bark, coconut ball things, peanut butter ball things, fudge, and hot chocolate.  My friend Kerri put this together, and it melted my ice cold heart through my stomach.

Why the silence around here?  I feel like lately nothing important enough has happened around here to bother mentioning... and now here goes a list of things that probably weren't worth mentioning:

The Beatles are on iTunes and I couldn't give two shits, I might have bad taste in music... but I also know when a dead horse has been beaten down dead.  Buy that music if you must, but don't expect it to sound any different than it did before it was on iTunes. 

There is still a trash bag under our fat tree.  Instead of caving in and buying a stupid expensive tree skirt, I've piled gifts all around it.  This hides that we are ridiculous, but doesn't change it.

My friend bought me The Sims 3 for Christmas... I have a problem.  I'm addicted to a computer game.  I've become the person that is embarrassing to be friends with.  I talk about my sims like they are real people, like how people talk about their pets... but pets are real and you feed them real food.

They don't serve fried food at Army basic training anymore.  I was like: THEY SERVED DONUTS AT BASIC TRAINING?!  If I ate a donut, there's no way I could work out all day after that even if it was honey dipped or jelly (my favorite).  I'd be wiping puke off myself the entire day and nobody wants that.

Black Swan.  It was a complete mind fuck.  I liked many parts of it: the dancing, the intensity, Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis (don't you just want to be her friend?  I do).  I did not like the graphic nature of many parts of it.  No the love scenes didn't bother me, it was the other graphic things that if you saw you'd be like: oh yeah it made me squirm, also those girls need to eat a donut or two.

In my latest Runner's World they sometimes have a section on celebrities or notable people who are runners, and I usually really enjoy this... unless they lie, and you can tell when they do, like this guy:

The guy in the green shirt and extra jacket layer (that they always make him wear) to hide extra weight (it's not doing a thing).  He claims he is a runner, he also claims that he runs to keep weight off.  Dude: You have the grossest job on the planet, and you cannot hide it.  Sure the job seems cool, but it's basically eating large quantities of food (like for 10 people) in one sitting and it never looks tasty.  He might be a runner, and I may be judging a little too hard here, but WTF... that is all. 

Raise your fork, it's almost Christmas

Obviously this night ended well and deliciously. 

To me, the holidays have always meant that indulgence is King and exercise is Queen.  I really love to eat all the sweets because it's only once a year... yeah some people have a different school of thought.  Some people count the calories, or say that they will only eat one treat or drink one cocktail.  I've done the whole: I'm not going to eat this because, I won't regret not eating it, and/or it will make me fat and hideous... but you know what, I regret it almost every time and I am not yet fat or hideous.  I think there are a hundred different ways to manage holiday weight gain, but which one is going to leave you feeling sad that you didn't get to try those cookies that your friend mailed to you?  Not my method, cookies are meant to be enjoyed.  The only thing that I skip is bad cooking...seriously.  I've been to a many holiday meals where the food was just horrible, so I piled salad on my plate and moved on to dessert.  Also, these holiday meals were massively low-key and nobody noticed that I skipped the God-awful stuffed-with-too-much-cheese shells.  Christmas is just once a year... bring on the seasonal treats and the spinning, leave behind the bad food and the regrets.

Pineapple Upside Down Cake - recipe by Paula Deen - Made by me - Calories 8 million and worth every eye popping bite.  My super picky uncle told me that this was "Fantastic", and that's the only time I've ever heard him use so much emotion when talking about dessert.

Chocolate chip banana bread - recipe by Nana - Made by me - Calories 1 million.
Banana bread without chocolate chips is like: Meh, but banana bread with chocolate chips suddenly becomes worth talking about.  This makes an excellent gift, like the kind people will actually want to eat.

Chocolate covered bacon - made by my husband - calories: Who the Eff cares? It is so good.  Why don't more bakeries sell this?  They would be billionaires.  Oh...maybe we need to sell chocolate dipped things that aren't boring fruit, we could dip bacon and chips and onion rings...this is coming soon to a city near you.


* This post applies to all holiday celebrations such as Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and New Years - I just happen to celebrate Christmas...

Full of Awesome

Obviously this moment ended well.  I was actually Trying to smile.
It was actually a little piece of 2.5 hours of hair highlighting hell.  Why did I do this again?  I was bored as shit.  I've had the same haircut forever, and am happy with it, so the only thing left to do is to add a little color to the situation so that every time I look in the mirror I'm not like, "Oh God, do something about that" and like not literally asking God or anything.  It's fine, but it's not exactly rocking my world... I think I just need a total head to toe makeover or a new 'tude.

A new outlook might help.  Tuesday, I hit the treadmill for a run at the gym and it went really well for once.  I felt strong, I could push when I asked myself to, I tackled some inclines, and I got out of there in one piece.  Unfortunately due to timing I missed my usual Tuesday night class with abs and weights, but the treadmill was enough after a long day of stressing o-u-t plus freaking out.

 Is this the most genius or the weirdest thing you have ever seen?  A salad with dressing being taken along in a travel shampoo bottle?  Yes it came as an empty bottle, I didn't have to empty out soap from it.  Ok, I know how this looks - not normal.  Here's the awesome part: these bottles do not leak.  Here's the un-awesome part: it's obviously a shampoo bottle and it looks like I wash my hair with Italian dressing!  Spread the good word, it works like magic.

Lastly, this is Lazy Laura's split pea soup for when you are stuck at home and are determined to eat through whatever you might have in the house instead of ordering the Chinese food you are desperately craving.

Ingredients:
1.5 cups of green split peas
0.5ish cups of lentils
2 cups of chopped carrots
1 can of beef broth
1 can of chicken broth
2 cups of water
sea salt, pepper, and a few shakes of red pepper flakes
3 cloves of garlic
olive oil

Serves 3-4 or just 1 with leftovers : )

Directions;
Chop garlic really small and then cook with a table spoon of olive oil in a pot.  After 3 or 4 minutes when garlic is ready, add the rest of the ingredients (rinse and check your split peas for any pebbles first).  Bring to a boil, simmer on medium for 1 hour so broth becomes nice and thick, stir at least every 10ish minutes.  Serve with some cheese sprinkled on your bowl for extra flavor - I used mozzarella.  This is so simple it will blow your mind!  - Especially when you're stirring it and realize it kind of stinks but actually tastes really good.